Dwight Schrute: Thanks for meeting me.
Michael Scott: Are you kidding? I'd come anywhere to see a turtle. Where'd you find him?
Dwight Schrute: There's no turtle, Michael. I just wanted to get you here.
Michael Scott: Ugh, c'mon, you know me, Dwight.
Dwight Schrute: I do know you, Michael. I'm your right-hand guy. I can't be the right hand to a completely new guy.
Michael Scott: Now I'm going to have to go online and look at turtles or else I'm going to be off the whole day.

Nate: [riding in car, looking for new office] Ten thousand seven hundred and six.
Dwight Schrute: Here it is, right here, pull over. Oh my God. No way. Man, look at that.
Nate: Yeah.
Dwight Schrute: There's no building. This could only mean one thing.
Nate: The building's underground?
Dwight Schrute: She was lying. Oh, Pam, Pam...
Dwight and Nate: Pam, Pam, Pam, Pam.
Passer-by: Yeah?
Nate: Pam. Pam?
Dwight Schrute: What?
Passer-by: I'm Pam.
Dwight Schrute: Oh.
Nate: No you're not.
Dwight Schrute: I'm sorry. We have a colleague with the same name.
Passer-by: Oh, that's fine.
Dwight Schrute: So, okay. You're not a liar too are you?
Passer-by:I've been known to bend the truth.
Dwight Schrute:Damn it, Pam! Get out! Right now! Leave it, I mean it! Get the hell out of here! Go!
Passer-by:Okay.
Dwight Schrute:I can't wait to do to Pam, what I just did... to Pam.

Michael Scott:(crying to Holly) I'm not strong! I'll go back to Jan, and I hate Jan!

Micheal Scott:Listen up, everybody. I have some news. We are screwed. Dunder Mifflin Scranton is being shut down.
Toby:Michael, um, we shouldn't be talking about his until all the decisions have been made.
Michael Scott:You knew about this all along, didn't you?
Toby:Jan told me just a few minutes before she told you.
Michael Scott:Traitor. You are a traitor.

Pam Beesly: Does anyone want to know where I've been for the last two hours?
Jim Halpert: Oh my God, I've been playing Zombie Soccer for two hours?

[putting his shoes back on, talking to the camera crew] Well, I guess this is it. Hey will you guys let me know if this ever airs? Thank you. -Michael

Oscar: I'll look on Web MD. What are your symptoms?
Angela: Oh everybody, Oscar found a reason to look on Web MD.

Ryan:Did this happen on company property?
Michael Scott:It was on company property, with company property. So, double jeopardy, we're fine.
Ryan:I don't think-- I don't think you understand how jeopardy works.
Michael Scott:Oh, I'm sorry. What is, 'we're fine'?

Dwight Shrute: Sometimes I wake up cradling a gourd.

Ryan: What I really want, honestly, Michael is for you to know it so that you can communicate it to the people here, to your clients, whomever.
Michael: It's whoever, not whomever.
Ryan: It's whomever.
Michael : No, whomever is never actually right.
Jim: Nope, sometimes it's right.
Creed: Michael is right. It's a made up word used to trick students-
Andy: No. Actually, whomever is the formal version of the word--
Oscar: Obviously it's a real word- but I don't know how to use it correctly.
Michael : [to camera] Not a native speaker.
Kevin: I know what's right. But I'm not gonna say. Because you're all jerks who didn't come see my band last night.
Ryan: Do you really know which one is correct?
Kevin: I don't know.
Pam Beesly: It's whom when it's the object of the sentence and who when as the subject.
Phyllis: That sounds right.
Michael: Well it sounds right but is it?
Stanley: How did Ryan use it, as an object?
Ryan: As an object.
Kelly: Ryan used me as an object.
Oscar: Is he right about that--
Pam : How did he use it again?
Toby: It was, Ryan wanted Michael, the subject, to explain the computer system, the object--
Michael: Thank you!
Toby:...to whomever, meaning us, the indirect object. Which is the, the correct usage of the word.
Michael:No one, uh asked you anything ever so whomever's name is Toby, why don't you take a letter opener and stick it in your skull?